Basicially your gf tries to change who you are, which will end in a disaster. If she cannot accept the fact that you happen to like a video game named dota and she forces you to quit playing something you enjoy, then it won't stop there. You will end up divorrced at some point and the relationship cannot stand much more than maybe 5 - 7 years. I'd talk to her and if she still wants to give you the ultimatum then you should leave her.
Jesus man, 9-12 matches per day, thats like at least 6 hours, I dont blame her if she told you that. reduce your play time buy 5 matches, I only prefer playing 1-2 matches per day (I play 4 matches per day now since its a break). Just promis her to play A LOT LESS and you should be fine.
I was supposed to ask you if youre from the Philippines because there are a lot of hopeless romantics here who tell their SO's to choose between her and Dota. lol. Its hard to be with someone who makes you choose between her and something that makes you happy. That's just unfair. So long as you know that Dota's not getting in the way of things and you know your priorities, then I dont see why you should quit something you love doing. I suggest that you dont specifically mention Dota. Just explain that a relationship cant work if someone's imposing something on the other just because.
Edit: Maybe meet halfway. I just read what the other guy said that you play at least 6 hours a day and I do think you should lessen it. Still, a partner shouldnt give you an ultimatum or something.
But yea you should definitely cut down your dota time to reasonable amount
If she still whines about it trying to shape you to whateverthefuckshewants you should definitely rethink about your relationship
I'm not going to give any suggestions/advice as i never had a girlfriend
But what i will say is that you asked for relationship advice on a dota forum.
And i have no idea about your situation, so i wont try, but all of this advice is blatently obvious, and it's circlejerking itself which you should've, and probably did, consider already before making this post
Problem about dota and life is that you can play dota whole day, hence dota=life. It is not football or hockey, you can play it max once a day before you get extremly exhausted and able to do other things besides dota. You can play less dota man, you need just to be able to do so.
Time management learn how to do it. I doubt she has anything. Against dota. But maybe you spend too much time playing rather than giving her time/ working/ studying. Which is unhealthy
honesly it all sounds to me like that if she succeeds with this, she's eventually going to threaten to leave you whenever she wants something while you don't
TBH i think its up to you whether to introduce dota2 to her or not
but i think its btter you end up marrying her and keep ur hobbies which is dota2 to urself
not because you're not letting her to play
but i guess this kinda game with toxic people
its not worth it
better end up playing somethign else
like ElDonger @AdmiralBulldog
You can probably find some middle ground between playing dota and spending time with your wife.
I will be marrying mine in a few months. My job as a Project Manager keeps me insanely busy running $20m worth of projects at any time. You have to have other stuff in life- whether it is friends, golf, working out, dota, whatever. Life is long and you are going to have to do other things besides 100% be with your spouse.
Accept that you wont be Sumail, play casually and frame it such that some guys like sports, some like golf, some like drinking with their buddies- you just like dota
I watch 6 hours of tv a day and my girlfriend says it's way too much and I need to quit or she'll leave me.
I work 6 hours of overtime every day and my girlfriend says it's way too much and I need to work normal 8 hours a day or she's out.
I spend 6 hours a day at the gym and while I look like an underwear model my girlfriend says I'm not spending enough time with her.
I'm pretty sure if you posted any of those these same retards saying "oh she's trying to change you keep playing dota!" would change their tune.
Sometimes you have to do these things, like the work thing or study thing, maybe it's not a choice. But essentially you are prioritizing your hobbies over spending time with her and she has an issue with it. Don't blame dota though, it's a symptom not necessarily the cause. You might quit and just spend that time doing something else. Figure out if you really want to give her the time she needs. It's natural for women on average to want more time than men, but there has to be a middle ground.
Yo dude if your girl give you a choice like that, maybe you went overboard with your gaming (you didnt spend time with her enough or you become lazy at work/study). Tone it down a bit. I have a wife and daily job and my agreement with her is I can play dota everyday but no more than 2 games. It's all about finding balance in life dude I hope you can manage it. In the end it wont be worth it to break up with the girl you love over dota, you will regret it bro.
I have the same issue right now. But I dont play 10 games a day. My gf obviously wants to control my life, so I can work more for us, cos she cares. If she wouldnt care about you, she would already leave you. I stated clearly that its my hobby and Im gonna play maybe 2-3 games every second day, but it doesnt work. She is preparing to leave me. But dota whick i call "my hobby" makes me dont care.
For woman its simple. She wants a man, not a kid playing video games. Its so assexual. Right now you should go to the gym, go ride a bike, and make sport your new hobby. Thats what Im going to do today, not tommorow. Now its all your choice man.
Anyway woman giving ultimatum is like Blunt wrote. Dont play dota for a while. You will see that nothing will really change for better with this specific gf. I tried this already. Im gonna train more than playin dota, but it wont really make my or your life better with this gf. I deleted dota for 3 months, and it got worse. She saw that she can demand new changes from me. eg. doing more in my apartment or working in my free time.
Imagine if you were going out getting drunk for 8hrs a day. Would it be unreasonable if a girlfriend turned around and said, it's the drink or me?
There's a difference between a girlfriend trying to control/change you to suit her image of a perfect bf and one who can legitimately see your behaviour isn't compatible with a healthy balanced life/relationship.
If playing 70hrs of computer games a week is important to you then you are with the wrong girl.
I mean what else do u spend leisure time on. Some just splurge on tv. It's the same shit. You're not doing anything productive. Issue is when u start fucking up your productive hours for it. That includes time u should spend with your gf
Your gf sounds like a c**t and you sound like a cuck, pandering to her egoistic needs.
Relationships should start with a good friendship, enjoying each other's hobbies, etc. It should come natural, rather than be a retarded forced love crap.
I have a girl, who's not my girlfriend, but we enjoy talking and going out together, sometimes we may fug dirty. Sometimes I feel as if our relationships are healthier than the shit I see around.
Besides, I don't even think one should obey what the woman thinks at all. If I were you, if you aren't in some kind of deep love, I'd easily drop such a girl for Dota, also assuming that I were to play Dota seriously and more frequently than I do now.
Thank. Me. Later.
Edit: But really good luck
Jesus man, 9-12 matches per day, thats like at least 6 hours, I dont blame her if she told you that. reduce your play time buy 5 matches, I only prefer playing 1-2 matches per day (I play 4 matches per day now since its a break). Just promis her to play A LOT LESS and you should be fine.
I only play 5-6 games a day max during holiday rofl
I was supposed to ask you if youre from the Philippines because there are a lot of hopeless romantics here who tell their SO's to choose between her and Dota. lol. Its hard to be with someone who makes you choose between her and something that makes you happy. That's just unfair. So long as you know that Dota's not getting in the way of things and you know your priorities, then I dont see why you should quit something you love doing. I suggest that you dont specifically mention Dota. Just explain that a relationship cant work if someone's imposing something on the other just because.
Edit: Maybe meet halfway. I just read what the other guy said that you play at least 6 hours a day and I do think you should lessen it. Still, a partner shouldnt give you an ultimatum or something.
But yea you should definitely cut down your dota time to reasonable amount
If she still whines about it trying to shape you to whateverthefuckshewants you should definitely rethink about your relationship
Anyway I don't play that much, overall a game a day/2days, i.e I just play too much once and stop playing for 2 weeks
You're on 71 hours past two weeks, balance your hours between dota and your girlfriend. It seems dota is getting more attention.
I'm not going to give any suggestions/advice as i never had a girlfriend
But what i will say is that you asked for relationship advice on a dota forum.
And i have no idea about your situation, so i wont try, but all of this advice is blatently obvious, and it's circlejerking itself which you should've, and probably did, consider already before making this post
Problem about dota and life is that you can play dota whole day, hence dota=life. It is not football or hockey, you can play it max once a day before you get extremly exhausted and able to do other things besides dota. You can play less dota man, you need just to be able to do so.
Wrong girl then.
Time management learn how to do it. I doubt she has anything. Against dota. But maybe you spend too much time playing rather than giving her time/ working/ studying. Which is unhealthy
honesly it all sounds to me like that if she succeeds with this, she's eventually going to threaten to leave you whenever she wants something while you don't
well if u ignore her for dota thats a problem, you can have dota and her in your life, just manage your time
TBH i think its up to you whether to introduce dota2 to her or not
but i think its btter you end up marrying her and keep ur hobbies which is dota2 to urself
not because you're not letting her to play
but i guess this kinda game with toxic people
its not worth it
better end up playing somethign else
like ElDonger @AdmiralBulldog
You can probably find some middle ground between playing dota and spending time with your wife.
I will be marrying mine in a few months. My job as a Project Manager keeps me insanely busy running $20m worth of projects at any time. You have to have other stuff in life- whether it is friends, golf, working out, dota, whatever. Life is long and you are going to have to do other things besides 100% be with your spouse.
Accept that you wont be Sumail, play casually and frame it such that some guys like sports, some like golf, some like drinking with their buddies- you just like dota
If you were smart, youd get rid of both. Your wiafu is alimoney style and dota means soloq which means suffering.
she thinks dota can be a hindrance to your relationship but to comply with that can cause suffocation on your part
Rephrase the question.
I watch 6 hours of tv a day and my girlfriend says it's way too much and I need to quit or she'll leave me.
I work 6 hours of overtime every day and my girlfriend says it's way too much and I need to work normal 8 hours a day or she's out.
I spend 6 hours a day at the gym and while I look like an underwear model my girlfriend says I'm not spending enough time with her.
I'm pretty sure if you posted any of those these same retards saying "oh she's trying to change you keep playing dota!" would change their tune.
Sometimes you have to do these things, like the work thing or study thing, maybe it's not a choice. But essentially you are prioritizing your hobbies over spending time with her and she has an issue with it. Don't blame dota though, it's a symptom not necessarily the cause. You might quit and just spend that time doing something else. Figure out if you really want to give her the time she needs. It's natural for women on average to want more time than men, but there has to be a middle ground.
Yo dude if your girl give you a choice like that, maybe you went overboard with your gaming (you didnt spend time with her enough or you become lazy at work/study). Tone it down a bit. I have a wife and daily job and my agreement with her is I can play dota everyday but no more than 2 games. It's all about finding balance in life dude I hope you can manage it. In the end it wont be worth it to break up with the girl you love over dota, you will regret it bro.
my boy rtz passed up on her gf to play dota
I have the same issue right now. But I dont play 10 games a day. My gf obviously wants to control my life, so I can work more for us, cos she cares. If she wouldnt care about you, she would already leave you. I stated clearly that its my hobby and Im gonna play maybe 2-3 games every second day, but it doesnt work. She is preparing to leave me. But dota whick i call "my hobby" makes me dont care.
For woman its simple. She wants a man, not a kid playing video games. Its so assexual. Right now you should go to the gym, go ride a bike, and make sport your new hobby. Thats what Im going to do today, not tommorow. Now its all your choice man.
Anyway woman giving ultimatum is like Blunt wrote. Dont play dota for a while. You will see that nothing will really change for better with this specific gf. I tried this already. Im gonna train more than playin dota, but it wont really make my or your life better with this gf. I deleted dota for 3 months, and it got worse. She saw that she can demand new changes from me. eg. doing more in my apartment or working in my free time.
Imagine if you were going out getting drunk for 8hrs a day. Would it be unreasonable if a girlfriend turned around and said, it's the drink or me?
There's a difference between a girlfriend trying to control/change you to suit her image of a perfect bf and one who can legitimately see your behaviour isn't compatible with a healthy balanced life/relationship.
If playing 70hrs of computer games a week is important to you then you are with the wrong girl.
@lex which is why it's important that you find someone who accepts your hobby or whatever it is you want to do in your free time
70hrs a week isn't a hobby.
i have 20.5 hours each 2 weeks. thats a hobby
I mean what else do u spend leisure time on. Some just splurge on tv. It's the same shit. You're not doing anything productive. Issue is when u start fucking up your productive hours for it. That includes time u should spend with your gf
Your gf sounds like a c**t and you sound like a cuck, pandering to her egoistic needs.
Relationships should start with a good friendship, enjoying each other's hobbies, etc. It should come natural, rather than be a retarded forced love crap.
I have a girl, who's not my girlfriend, but we enjoy talking and going out together, sometimes we may fug dirty. Sometimes I feel as if our relationships are healthier than the shit I see around.
Besides, I don't even think one should obey what the woman thinks at all. If I were you, if you aren't in some kind of deep love, I'd easily drop such a girl for Dota, also assuming that I were to play Dota seriously and more frequently than I do now.